Wednesday, November 5, 2008

It wasn't the perfect ending.

I was disheartened to read that "Prop 8" was passed in California.

I will never understand opinions such as, "Allowing gay marriage will undermine what it means to be married". Or, this even worse, ill-conceived brain fart, "What's next? Letting men and dogs marry? Legalizing Pedophilia?"

I loathe adding that last part, but there are people who propagate that swill. As a serious argument, is this the best the dissenting side can come up with?

My marriage is relatively strong, as marriages go. The only people who can undermine that is my husband and I.

People talk about this as an moral issue. Where's the morality in not allowing a person to be told of their partner's medical status while he or she is laying in the hospital because he or she is not "family"? Where is the morality in telling a person that their partner cannot be covered under their partner's health insurance, because they are not considered a "spouse"?

Where is the morality in telling a couple that their commitment, their love, their union is less than what the "status quo" dictates?

Gays did not make a choice to be gay. The choice they want to make is to be recognized as married in every sense of the word.

Why can't it just be that simple?


  1. You are good people. Wanna join a movement?

  2. Prop 8 passing disheartened me as well. Loving, committed couples who just happen to be same-gendered don't weaken marriage.

    In fact, straights like me could learn a lot about commitment from the lesbian couple who finally married after being together for years despite being considered "undeserving" of the legal and economic protections of marriage. We could learn a lot about cherishing marriage from George Takei and his partner, who married in California and now have had their married status taken away from them and now vow to fight to get it back. How do these beautiful stories of commitment weaken my marriage?

    What weakens my marriage is those sanctimonious people who want to make my marriage into their political issue by framing it in their exclusive Christian country-club image. They give their blessing on my marriage because I'm straight, my husband is straight, and we married in a church. Those items, straight and Christian, are trivialities. The heart of my marriage is LOVE, and love is too big for anyone to co-opt.

    Which is why Prop 8's passage is so disheartening -- it is a legal attempt to co-opt love as a straight, evangelical Christian entity.

    I'm sure in my heart of hearts that God is not amused.

  3. And if you want to get real tin foil hatty, the argument could be made that if we allow the religious right to continue to dictate to governments on how to "define" marriage, what's not stopping the expansion of that definition...
    Marriage between divorced couples nullified.
    Child-free marriages unrecognized.

    I see that as a more realistic scenario than someone wanting to marry their dog if gay marriage was to become a legal right.

    But like I say, tin foil hatty. Perhaps.

  4. Sure, Stephen, I like movements. Stretching is a good movement. Hugging is a better movement still.

    Okay, seriously. Tell me more.

  5. Or was that a rhetorical question?

  6. I am so saddened by this, I can't tell you. I have been researching organizations all day. I have no clue which one to call and say let me help! LOL.

  7. I've been talking to some friends, and to make a long story short, we simply don't know what to do.